Betty ford says i'm here all night
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
