cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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