I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
