Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
