I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
