i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
