its not stalking. its research.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
