It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Please don't give away my fajitas
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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