Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
