Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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