Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
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