i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
