No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
