it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
