oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Come see our sink grown plant.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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