you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Randomize
