Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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