i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
it's like iHOP with fire
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Randomize
