remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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