my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
