i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Randomize
