Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Randomize
