when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
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