U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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