She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
