At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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