And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Vodka?
Forever.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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