he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
