the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
