Princesses don't give blow jobs
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
