tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
