I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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