ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
"it" just moved
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
