some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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