I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Randomize
