? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
