But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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