didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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