He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
