You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
