He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
