Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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