i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
When did angry sex become our thing?
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
