butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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