So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
