living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize