dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Randomize
