My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
