Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
