My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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